What to do if you fall in a conversation with someone over the
terrorist attacks who doesn’t believe in retaliation.
1.Engage in a conversation, and ask if military force is
2.When he says “NO,” ask, “Why not?”
3.Wait untill he says something to the effect of “Because that
would just cause more innocent deaths, which would be awful and
we shouldn’t cause more violence.
4.When he is mid-sentence, punch him in the face as hard as you
5.When he gets back up to punch you, point out that it would be
a mistake and contrary to his values to strike you, because that
would be awful and he shouldn’t cause more violence.
6.Wait till he agrees, and has pledged not to commit additional
7. Punch him in the face again, harder this time.
REPEAT STEPS 5 THROUGH 7 UNTIL HE UNDERSTANDS THAT SOMETIMES
IT’S NECESSARY TO STRIKE BACK!
What’s the difference between an Afghani woman and a catfish?
One has whiskers and smells really bad.
The other one’s a fish.
The bell rings and Billy and Sally, along with all the other
kids run through the classroom door. They all sit down in their
The teacher goes up to Sally and asks, “Sally what did you do
today at recess?” And Sally says happily.” I played in the sand
box.” The teacher then says,”If you can go up to the board and
spell SAND, then I will give you a fresh baked cookie. The Sally
goes up to the board and spells SAND and recieves a fresh baked
The the teacher goes up to Billy and asks, “Billy, what did you
do at recess?” Billy replies,”I played in the sand box with
Sally.” The teacher replies, “OK, well if you can go up to the
board and spell BOX,then I will give you a fresh baked cookie.
Billy goes up to th board and spells BOX, then recieves a fresh
The teacher moves on to Apu (a small muslim boy) and asks, “What
did you do today at recess?” Apu brushes the tears aside and
replies in a sad voice, “Billy and Sally threw rocks at me!” The
teacher looks at him and says, “Oh, well that sounds like racial
discrimination to me………….
if you can go up to the board and spell racial dicrimination,
I’ll give you a fresh baked cookie…”
One day, Bush was talking with Osama Binladen on the phone, they
couldn’t trace from where the call was coming from, but Osama
“I’ve got good news and bad news.”
Bush replied, “What’s the good news?”
“I’m turning myself in,” said Osama. “But the bad news is, I’m
coming on a plane
Osama’s Maama is so loose she uses a raft as a diaphram.
Osama’s Maama is so loose it don’t hert when she give beshe
can’t give birth cuz her hole never closes.
How can you tell the difference between the Taliban boys and the
When the boys become men they take their diapers off their asses
and stick them on their heads.
Osama bin Laden,
You son of a bitch!
I hope you balls develop
a seven year itch.
Your pecker is twisted
in such a fine manner,
Your asshole can whistle,
“The star-spangled banner.”
One day, george bush and osama bin laden had a meeting about
peace in afghanastan. They were talking about peace and fairness
when osama pushed a button and a fist came out and punched
george. He pretended not to notice and they kept talking when
osama pushed the second button and a fist came out and punched
him on the face. Again they pretended not to notice and went on.
Finally, osama pushed the third button and it jabbed bush on the
nuts and this time, Bush got up and told osama ” meeting over,
tommorrow we are going to have another meeting in america.
So the next day, they were in d.c and talking when bush
pressed the first button, osama saw this and jumped ten feet
high but nothing happened and bush started to giggle. Later, He
pressed the second button and osama jumped up and shrieked, but
still nothing happened and now bush was cracking up. They kept
on going and Bush pressed the third button and this time osama
ran around in circles jumping and yelling, but still nothing
happened and now bush was on the floor laughing and osama had
enough so he said “that’s it i’m going back to afghanastan ” and
bush goes “what afghanastan?”
If you lift bin Laden’s turban do you know what you will find?
You would find his butt. You know why? He is a butt head!!