Stupid Things to do at the dinner table

1. Start chewing with your mouth open and make really sick
noises. When your parents go “Stop chewing with your mouth
open!” Say that your jaw really hurts when you keep your mouth
closed for more than 2 seconds.

2. Ask your parents if you can have brocolli for desert. If
they say “Awww….isn’t that sweeet……..” say that you need
to eat healthy a night before you rob the bank. Heheheheheheheh.

3. Before dinner, ask if you can go out for dinner. If you
succeed, on the drive there, tell your parents that your friend
will be there because you are both going out on a date and she
can’t sit in the room near you two. Watch as your parents make a
U-Turn right there.

4. At the dinner table, secretly snatch the salad dressing from
the salad and replace it with seltzer water. Say “Mom, this
stuff tastes like bubbly soda. New recipe?”

5. Secretly snatch all the silverware from the silverware
cabinet. Tell your parents there is no need to worry, you
learned to make forks and spoons out of paper in art class.
Take some time to teach them.

6. Start a nice conversation. Suddenly go- “Ewwww…..something
smells………..its coming from the right side of the table.!”
Make sure somebody you hate is sitting in the table you say.
Then your parents will say “Just ignore it.” Than say: “Ignore
it? How would you like it if the smell of hot gasoline was
bothering you so much you lost all your sense of smell, and then
you just say “Just Ignore it.”

7. Tell your parents how good the meal is that you normally
hate. Then they’ll say: “Why do you like it now?” Then you say
“Well compared to the sloppy joes served at school, they’re
awesome!” Parents: “Then I’m sure you loved those sloppy joes.”
You: “No, they tasted like caster oil.”